Wow, Its already the first day of September, my birthday month and all I can think about is how much my life has changed! 10 years ago, I would’ve been ready for the slight turn-up, this year I am sitting back and reflecting on how amazing life is and how much is has changed for the better in just a short time.
I realize, although 33 is no longer 23, its also not 43 and there are some things that need to be taken care of in order to flourish. I mean, as we become wives and mothers, often times we get put on the back burner and our lives turn into “what does so and so have to do?” followed with appointments and volleyball games, and t-ball Saturdays, cooking dinner each and every day of the night, followed with baths and bedtime stories, oh and don’t forget “hubby time”. Whew, we can overexert ourselves and sometimes that leaves us with a sense of emptiness. Not because we are lonely but because inside we are not completely fulfilled. A lot of us look good on the outside and people assume that we are all good on the inside, although that may not be completely true.
I have found a few things that have helped me embrace my new age and my new life and I thought this would be a great time to share with each and every one of my Modern Day Mom’s and readers.
#1. Embrace Your Appearance
Ok, I get it, you may not look like you did 10 years ago, or even fit in to your jeans from high school but you’re not that same person either. The only thing you can do is exercise to get that baby weight (love weight) off or embrace those curves girl! My husband tells me all the time how much he loves my body and for the longest, I didn’t understand how he could love it! I mean, I’ve definitelyput on some weight since we first started dating and I hated it but he assured me that he didn’t. That love showed me that its ok.
While I am still on the quest to completely change my eating and workout routines, I have learned to love my body and dress it how I want!
#2. Take Control of Your Health
Yeah, I know we all have OBGYN’s for our yearly exams and we don’t mind going to a prompt care from time to time but get yourself a family doctor. One that will get to know you and that you can get checked when you have a weird bump or pain that just won’t go away.
Not only that, its time to put that hot Cheetos and Kool-aid down, we have to look at where we come from. I know in the black community Pork chops, Mac n cheese, and sweet potatoes are also a hit, but the result of those amazing should food Sundays can easily put a damper on our health which means that we need to eat better! Also, show our kids that healthy food can also taste amazing! Don’t be afraid to season up some asparagus or throw those chicken wings on the grill rather than frying them.
#3 Find Your Daily Mantra
Mantras, Affirmations, Daily reminders are things that we all need! Seriously, if you keep telling yourself the same thing over and over again eventually you’ll believe it right! So, tell yourself something positive each and every day until you see your life shift. I truly believe that whatever you put into the universe will directly effect your life. Here are a few; You can not expect victory when planning for defeat. Just because you are struggling does NOT mean that you are failing. Every great success requires some kind of struggle to get there.
#4. Get a hobby
This is one of my favorites because I am a creative! Im literally always brainstorming ways to put my creative juices into the universe. I love creating new stuff, whether it’s creating content for my blog, new MDM merchandise, decorating my home or putting together new outfits. I also love baking. I actually have a business called “It’s Cakes By Erin” on the side which is on a temporary hiatus but that is also one of my loves.
#5 Seek Inspiration
Seeking inspiration can come from anywhere. Whether you are doing something as simple as downloading an app or reading a T.D. Jakes empowerment book, taking a few minutes to soak up the sun and just meditate about your life. ALWAYS SEEK GOOD.
#6 Find out how you can DESTRESS
Remove that tongue from the roof of your mouth, unclench your jaw, and open up your hand. You probably didn’t realize that you were doing one of those things right now. Those are all ways said to hold in stress which is something that we all need to let go of. Especially when stress is the number one killer. We’ve gotta let that shit go! So find ways to destress and that work for you. I enjoy, writing new blog posts, listening to podcasts, and cleaning. Find your niche and when you start to feel a bit stressed, do it. I promise it won’t hurt anyone and your family will thank you for it in the long room.
#7 STOP COMPARING
Seriously, I’m going to say it again! STOP COMPARING! Your journey is your journey and no matter how beautiful someone else’s journey looks, its theres. Plus who knows, it may not be what all its cracked up to be but thats neither here nor there because its not your business. So many of us compare our day 1 to someone else’s day 7 hundred 71, not realizing that this has been a journey for them. Not only that, they’ve had a ton of ups and downs although they only show the ups, you find yourself upset because you’re not there yet. But guess what, you’re not alone. Just stop before you really upset your whole entire life.
#8. Help Others
Thats pretty self explanatory. Whether you are helping someone by holding the door, paying a bill, or even paying them a compliment. It’s totally ok. You will feel good internally and I swear you will make someone feel so much better. Also, Help another mom. There are times when moms are in the store with there babies and their babies are acting a fool. Tell her “it’s ok, we’ve all been there.” There are times when that is all you need to survive the day. Many are fighting a battle that we know nothing about.
#9. Learn How to Say No
As a Mama we wear so many hats. We are literally the cook, the coach, the nurse, the taxi, the slave, the motivator and so much more so guess what? If it doesn’t serve you or your family, SAY NO! I am actually still learning to do this and it is such a struggle but this is imperative to our well being.
#10. Treat Yo’ Self!
Last but not least…don’t forget that you are mom! You are the GOAT, the QUEEN, the one everyone leans on and you have to take care of yourself first. I know you’ve heard the saying, you can’t serve from an empty cup. Well do something for you and make yourself happy! Buy that coffee, that purse, that new shirt that is going to make you feel amazing! It’s all good and in the long run…you will feel awesome while indulging or using in something you love!